Held

Today has been such a tragic day for our little town.  One of our sweet, 16 year old, teenage girls went to heaven this morning.  She was the kindest person with a smile that will forever be stuck in my brain.  I truly have no words except to ask all my friends to keep the Dotson family in your prayers today and everyday for a long time.  Their family is the best, and this community will rally around them any way we can. 

 

This song came to my heart today.  Just read the words and pray.

 

"Held"

Two months is too little
They let him go
They had no sudden healing
To think that providence
Would take a child from his mother
While she prays, is appalling
Who told us we'd be rescued
What has changed and
Why should we be saved from nightmares
We are asking why this happens to us
Who have died to live, it's unfair
This is what it means to be held
How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved and to know
That the promise was when everything fell
We'd be held
This hand is bitterness
We want to taste it and
Let the hatred numb our sorrows
The wise hand opens slowly
To lilies of the valley and tomorrow
This is what it means to be held
How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved and to know
That the promise was that when everything fell
We'd be held
If hope is born of suffering
If this is only the beginning
Can we not wait, for one hour
Watching for our savior
This is what it means to be held
How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved and to know
That the promise was that when everything fell
We'd be held

 

XO,

Robin

Let me introduce you to my friend....Sara from The Rosy Life

Hi everyone!!!  Gabe and I returned from an amazing getaway today.  It was for our 12 year anniversary, and it couldn't have been more perfect.  Thank you for all the anniversary wishes!  I'll post about that in the next day or two. 

Today I want you to meet my friend, Sara.  She is an extremely gifted artist, photographer, and blogger.  She is just so....happy!  I love looking at her blog, because it makes me smile.  A few weeks ago she sent me the cutest "happy package" in the mail (Do you love receiving things via mail?  I LOVE it!).  Anyhoo, it had the sweetest note, a picture she painted me, and two ribbons with the words JOY and BRAVE.  Here are pictures of the gifts.

 She added a note on the back of this painting that reads: "Imagine the glow, light, and twinkle if all the prayers said for you from all the people storming the gates of Heaven were combined.  Can you even imagine?  The darkness just doesn't stand a chance."  Sara is such a gift and encourager to me.

I also want to show you her cute art studio and some of her paintings.  She sells her paintings on Etsy so please buy from her if you love her work as much as I do.  She really puts her heart into everything she creates.

Art studio 

Her blog is www.therosylife.blogspot.com.  Her etsy shop is http://etsy.com/shop/TheRosyLife.

I hope y'all are having a fabulous weekend.  Remember, today is a gift.  Be sure to call or text someone you haven't talked to lately, and let them know how much they mean to you.  It will make their day, and you will get a blessing from it, too. 

XO,
Robin

Pioneer Woman Goodness and Health Update

Let's get the boring stuff out of the way.  I saw Dr. Beck yesterday to follow up on my lab work.  He said my tumor markers have gone up about 400 points.  What???!!!!!  I thought they would be a lot lower.  BUT, he said my LDH and other liver numbers are down which means my liver is functioning even better than it was last month.  Yay!  According to my history (per him), when my LDH numbers start going down my tumor markers are sure to follow.  He thinks the cancer cells are dying, and they are being released into my bloodstream which accounts for the high marker number.  Does that make sense?  Soooooo, boo to high markers, but I'm glad there is a reason behind it.  I see Beck again in 2 weeks to look at my blood work so please pray my liver function keeps improving, and my tumor markers are a lot lower.  It can happen, and I'm believing it will!!!!  I will keep you posted.

Now on to the fun stuff.  Have you seen The Pioneer Woman's new kitchen collection at Wal-Mart?  I can't even.  Y'all, it is so dang cute.  The prices are really reasonable, too.  I love her even more that she would sell her items in Wal-Mart for us country folk.  Here are a few of my favorites.  Swoon.

 

 

I can't get over how cute everything is, and I've only shown you a sliver of the collection.  You can view the whole thing on www.Walmart.com/pioneerwoman , but a LOT of the items are sold out.  Just keep checking back periodically.  That's what I'm going to do.  I really want it all.  It would be perfect in my kitchen!!!!  Ahem....Christmas ideas my dear, sweet family members.  Some of you might receive her stuff as gifts, too.  If she isn't forever sold out. 

 

 

XO,

Robin

Buddy Bench

I thoroughly enjoy having a blog, but a writer I am not.  I tend to stick to the "fun" things like pictures of the house, my kids, family vacations, favorite products, etc.  Today I felt like writing from my heart.  It won't be super deep, so don't worry, but if I'm thinking about it then maybe it's crossed your mind, too. 

BUDDY.  Webster's defines it as: Chum, crony, pal, sidekick.  A close friend who accompanies his buddies in their activities.  I like all those definitions.  At Emme's school they have a "Buddy Bench" on the playground.  Kids sit there when they don't have a friend to play with, and then the other children know to go over there and ask that child to join them.  Is that the coolest concept?  Well, until today, it was a concept.  Until today (to my knowledge) neither one of my kiddos has sat on it.  Until today.  I ate lunch with Emme and was driving away when I saw her sitting on the buddy bench.  Oh man.  My heart jumped to my throat.  I just wanted to jump out of my car, run to her, and tell her it was going to be ok.  But I didn't.  As I was exiting the school, one of the sweet teachers was sitting by her and talking to her.  Thank goodness for our teachers. 

That whole scene got me thinking about how good it is to have a buddy or buddies, and just how much God has blessed me with them.  I have quite a few friends I can call at any time, for any reason, and they'll be there for me.  They have been there for me.  Some I talk to almost everyday, and some I haven't talked to in a while but know we still care for one another.  I think God puts those special people in our lives to make life better.  Lighten our loads in this crazy world.  Listen to us when we need to laugh or cry or just vent about stupid things.  Friends are a gift. 

"A friend loves at all times.  He is there to help when trouble comes." Proverbs 17:17 (NIRV).

I found out later that 3 boys came up to Emme on the buddy bench and asked if she would be their cheerleader while they played football.  She was good with that.  Oh, heaven help us! :-)

My prayer for you is that you always have a buddy bench to sit on when you need it.  If you don't have a good friend, pray for one.  God cares about relationships, and He cares about you.  Also, please pray that your children find great friends who stick close to them and care about them.  It is SO important! 

I hope y'all have a great Labor Day weekend!!!!
XO,
Robin

Keeping and Laundry Room

Happy Sunday!  It is rainy where we live, but we are needing it so no complaints here.  It's a good day to read a book and look at decorating magazines.  Oh, who am I kidding?  I never need an excuse for that.

I am in the process of redecorating my home and thought I'd show you a few pictures of the keeping room (off the kitchen) and the laundry room.  We have a few rooms finished, but we still have quite a bit left.  It's never ending when your passion is decorating.  I absolutely love it, though!!! 

Keeping Room

Laundry Room

Excuse the mess in this picture!  The plates have ladybugs on them.  I just love ladybugs! They are so happy.

 

I'll show more pictures as I finish rooms. 
Hope you have a wonderful Sunday!
XO,
Robin

Texas Trip, First Day of School, and a Prayer Request

Hi everyone!  Are you getting adjusted to school being back in session?  We are getting there, but the pick-up line is a completely different experience.  I pick up Emme first then over to Eli.  I still don't know what time to leave my house to get there early enough.  Oh, the problems of a mom. Ha!

Here are pictures of Eli and Emme on the first day of school.  If you follow me on Facebook then these are a repeat for you.  What I've learned from looking at everyone else's first day of school pictures is that I've got to step up my game on the sign they hold up.  What the heck?  Have you seen some of the signs???!!!!  Oh my.  I need to take art classes to even be on the same planet as you awesome, creative moms!  Oh well.  I was just happy we weren't late on the first day of school.  Oh wait.  We were. 

We had a blast in Texas last week.  Per my prior post, the doctors visits were amazing.  I already have more energy this week then/than (I never remember which word to use) I have had in a long time.  I'm not ready for a marathon, but I don't need to nap as much which is a big accomplishment.

Pictures in the car on the way there.  Our sweet friends, Jack and Brook Hudgins, gave the kids a box full of activities for the car.  They are so thoughtful!!!  One of Emme's gifts was a pair of slippers that she could decorate herself.  Girl heaven.

The kids spent the night with my nephew, Josh, and his wife Katie.  They have a sweet daughter (yes, my great-niece) named Charlotte who is between Eli and Emme in age.  They had a wonderful time.  Here is a picture of Emme and Charlotte.  Charlotte's shirt is hilarious.  It says "I was Charlotte first".  I didn't get it at first, but it is regarding the new Princess Charlotte of Wales.  So cute!!!!  Or cheeky, as they would say. Maybe.

My sisters took Eli to the Lego store while Katie and I took the girls to The American Girl Store.  Eli had so much fun there.  They bought him a very cool Star Wars Lego set that he finished building yesterday.  He has the patience for all those tiny pieces.  He didn't get that from me. 

Sooooooo, that leads me to the American Girl Store.  Oh.My.Goodness.  It was so fun.  The store is HUGE!  The girls just kept squealing with delight.  It was beyond cute.  We then took them upstairs to the doll salon (yes, I'm serious), but they were booked so we'll put that on our list for next time.  I was really hoping to get Emme's doll's hair brushed.  It looks like she's trying to grow dread locks.  The doll's hair is a hot mess.  Anyway, we looked around some more at the clothes and accessories until it was time for our Bistro reservation.  Talk about adorable.  The waitress brings a high chair, cup, and plate for the dolls.  The food was really great, too.  A perfect selection for kids and moms.  We are going back to Dallas in December for another office visit with Dr.Asbury, and we might swing by the store for tea and that salon visit. 

We also laid out by the pool, shopped, and just had a lot of fun.  It was a perfect end to the summer break, and I'm so grateful.

I don't want to go into great detail, but I would like for you all to pray for one of my dear friends.  She has to bury her stillborn baby boy tomorrow (he was 36 weeks so almost ready to meet the world).  I just can't even.  I really wish I could take the load for her, but she and her husband are going to have to walk this path together with the support of family and friends.  Since finding out, I've had a few other people I didn't know reach out to me about their cancer battles.  Sometimes it just feels like bad things are all around us.  I know it's not true, because we all have a LOT to be thankful for, but it just feels like that at times.  The song that keeps playing over and over again in my head is "Blessed Be The Name of the Lord".  It's a reminder of praising Him in the good times and bad.  I don't understand why bad things happen, but I do know that He is with us through all of them.  Here are the words to the song in case you or someone you know needs to hear them.

Blessed Be Your Name by Matt Redman

 

Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

 

 

XO,

Robin

I'm Gettin' Healthy!

I know a lot of you have been texting to see how my doctor's appointments went this week so I thought I would write it all here to keep everyone up to date. 


I saw Dr. Beck (oncologist) Tuesday, and after I gave him a really hard time about my near death experience, he prescribed me 2 different chemo pills to be taken daily.  Easy enough!  I go back Monday for another blood draw to see if my tumor markers are dropping, which I fully intend for them to be!  After seeing Dr. Beck, my sister, the kids and I took off for the Big D.  Ahhhhhh, home of 106* and shopping galore.  Actually, they are having a cold snap tomorrow, and the temp should only be 98*.  I should have brought a sweater. :-)


Today consisted of 2 doctor's visits.  I had a thermograph scan this morning, which is a very non-invasive scan to see where you have trouble spots in your body based on your body temperature.  It is very easy, and I highly recommend it.  The 2nd appointment was this afternoon with Dr. Asbury to go over my results and come up with a plan to get me healthy.  She said I'm actually not that big of a mess considering what my body has been through the past 2 years (she said it much more professionally than that).  That was a great surprise.  She is focusing on getting my immune system to where it should be so my liver can fight off the cancer.  This plan of action consists of a lot of detox, supplements, and strict diet.  I've actually been eating the right things (thanks to my sister, Terri) so I'm a little ahead of the game.  I always thought the organic, non-GMO way of eating was a little silly.  Now I'm a believer!  It works, y'all.  I'm actually going to start incorporating some of my healthy ways into my family's diet, but don't tell them. 


I am very excited to get started on everything so I can begin to see how my body is responding.  That being said, Dr. Asbury stressed the importance of me making my health regimen take priority over everything else.  So I'm going to be saying no to a lot more.  Don't take it personal.  It's not forever!  She just wants me to take more time for myself now so I can have more time for others later.  I hope that makes sense.   


Now that the doctor's appointments are over, we are planning on having fun the rest of the week.  Emme and I are going to have lunch and shop at the American Girl Store with my niece and her daughter tomorrow.  I'm just as excited as Emme!  While we're doing that, my sisters are taking Eli to the Lego store.  Do I have the best family or what?  They spoil us rotten!  Friday's agenda includes a trip to IKEA and probably laying out by the pool.  I know.  Rough life. 


I hope y'all are having a great week.  Enjoy it before the busyness of school begins. 


XO,
Robin

Friday Favorites

I'm keeping today's Friday Favorites short and sweet.  This is one of my favorite posts, because I'm still here to write it!!!  Woo hoo!  This was taken today, and I still don't have my legs under me, but I'm still here!!!!! 

I want to send a special shout out to this guy, too.  Gabe has stayed right by my side through it all.  It hasn't always been easy or pretty, but we are stronger because of it. 

I just can't express how much your prayers mean to us.  They are not ever, ever taken for granted.  I promise you that.  One of my sweet friends sent me this message, and it brought happy and grateful tears to my eyes.  I wanted to share it with you:

"Oh Robin, so sorry to hear you had such a scary reaction! Goodness that must have been scary for you both! You are in our thoughts and prayers here...every single time your name and beautiful face pops into my head I pray. At all hours of the day or night. Sometimes I wish you could picture the dark night, with every single prayer uttered for you by all of "us" on fb, blogs, churches, etc. all lit up like a star. Can you even imagine the glow? You are so loved and so prayed over and we're not going to quit."

Thank you, thank you, thank you for being so sweet to us.
XO,
Robin

Antibody fail, bigtime!!!!!

That's an understatement, too.  You know how they list that "these side effects only happen to 1% of patients"?  Well, that was me yesterday.  I thought about not sharing the details, but I feel like y'all have been on this journey with me so let's keep it up!

Gabe and I got to the chemo room yesterday at 8:30 and they started all my pre-meds so I would hopefully not have a reaction.  Well, about 5 minutes into them giving me the antibody drug, I had a severe allergic reaction and almost died.  Literally.  My blood pressure bottomed out, then it shot way up and I passed out.  My head was on fire, and my eyes felt like they were going to pop out of my head.  I also broke out into hives. Goodness.  I woke up to see a lot of nurses and a doctor hovering over me.  Scary stuff, people.  Poor Gabe.  He never gets scared, but I could tell this shook him up.  BUT, God was right there with me holding my hand, too.  I'm obviously unable to continue with this clinical trial, but I'm ok with that.  There must be a reason God has kept me around this long, and I know there must be something else out there for me to accomplish for His kingdom and also another type of medication to take. I meet with Dr. Beck next Tuesday, and immediately after that my sister, the kids, and I are going to Dallas to stay with my other sister.  She has an appointment for me in Dallas to see a very qualified Naturopath doctor.  She went through medical school and finished with her Ph.D as an Internist then decided there has to be more out there than traditional medicine and has been researching ever since.  I see her Wednesday and Thursday so please pray that goes well.  She's told my sister from the start that cancer is not as scary as everyone thinks it is, and it can most likely go into remission if we can get the right things going in my body to help strengthen my immune system.

I can say I am at home today.  I feel like I've been hit by a train, but the hives are gone, and I don't have any other weird things happening - thank the Lord!!!!

As usual, please keep up in your prayers, and I'll keep you posted via this blog.  Also, I'm sorry if there are a few typos and errors.  I'm still not quite up to par!!!!!

XO,
Robin

Florida, Friends, and Fighting Cancer

Hey, hey, hey!  We returned last Sunday from a quick trip to Navarre Beach in Florida.  Our wonderful friends, Josh and Kendra Thompson, invited us and we said YES!  We love traveling with them.  You know what I mean.  Just because you're friends does not mean you travel well together.  They make traveling fun and so easy. 

I thought I'd share a few pictures from the trip. 

 

Emme was ready to go!!!

This is our view from the condo.  It's gorgeous and right out our back door!

We ate at Dewey's in Destin.  If you've never eaten there, you must try it next time you go.  They have a nice restaurant, and the original dive.  Eat at the original.  You won't regret it.  Gabe can't seem to order anything but the crab-stuffed, bacon wrapped shrimp.  Oh my.  I had the gumbo and it was amazing!!!!

This is Jagger NOT smiling for me!

We noticed on the trip that Jagger and Emme paired up more than usual.  She was always trying to "help" him.  Lord help us if those two get married someday! :-) 

This was my view most days.  We were on the beach, too, but the kids actually preferred the pool.  Go figure.

 

Ice cream is always a good idea.

This trip came at a perfect time.  We learned last week that my tumor markers have increased quite a bit.  I saw the doctor yesterday, and I am starting a clinical trial tomorrow with another IV chemo and an antibody drug.  Tomorrow will be a very long day so say an extra prayer for me if you think of it.  It won't be as bad once I get this appointment behind me.  Dr. Beck is also very hopeful that this will work to kill off my cancer.  I haven't seen him that positive...well, ever!  It's going to be a rough road, but I'm ready for the fight.  The rest in Florida did my body and mind some good.  I feel like God has His hand on my head directing my every step.  There have been mainly curves and blind spots on this road, but I always feel His hand guiding me.  Sometimes the answer is immediate, but sometimes we are in a holding pattern.  Regardless, He is there.  We are ready to fight, fight, fight! 

Thank you again for all your prayers, messages, and gifts.  You all are so good to us!!!!!!!!  I'll keep you posted, but it might be a few days.  The chemo might make me sick and keep me in bed a bit, but hopefully not.

XO,
Robin